DS9 Season 2, Ep4: “Invasive Procedures”

Synopsis: We open with a Sisko voice-over explaining that they had to evacuate the station again because of violent plasma discharges in space, forcing them to keep things going with a skeleton crew. It must have seriously been a pain in the ass to evacuate everybody when they just got them back from being evacuated last week. Let’s hope Jake and Nog got to go to the same place this time.

In Ops, hell freezes over as Kira tells Sisko that she has to commend the Cardassians on their station design, as the plasma discharges aren’t effecting them very much. Jadzia says she has some escape vehicles ready to go just in case. Irishy and Odo are elsewhere on the station securing the airlocks when they find Quark sitting in the docking ring, apparently meditating. Odo is exasperated, because Quark is only still on the station because he refused to evacuate without his vast supply of latinum, and he was supposed to be confined to the bar.

Quark says that he’s here because he was saying goodbye to Rom, and Odo points out that Rom’s shuttle left three hours ago, and he somehow doubts that Quark was sitting out here pining away for his idiot brother. Quark protests that brothers have a very special relationship, asking Irishy if he has any brothers that he ever had to say goodbye to. Apparently Irishy has two, and he had to bid them so long when he joined Starfleet. Quark is all, “and didn’t that make you CRY and CRY?” and Irishy is all, “I guess?” and Quark is all, “I rest my case,” and they all leave the docking ring sighing at each other. As the door to the docking ring shuts, the camera zooms in on a mysterious blinking something that is almost definitely the real reason Quark was in there.

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